Cheese In The News – Vol. 10

Because Nothing Says “Happy Birthday” Like Cheese…

Olwyn Green, of New Zealand decided to buy an 8 lb wheel of white Lancashire Crumbly, her husband Jim’s favourite cheese, while visiting relatives in northern England, to bring back for his 75th birthday.  But thanks to Iceland’s increased promiscuity resulting in a lack of virgins to sacrifice to the angry volcano gods, poor Olwyn had to take the long way home via Wales, France, Belgium, Holland, Germany, Denmark, Sweden, the United Arab Emirates, and finally, home. My man wants a medal when he goes to the grocery store. Maybe Olwyn’s got a much, much younger brother?

Proof That We Are Really Not That Nice…

I’m sorry to subject you to another post about Poutine, but it would seem this gastronomic calamity is actually gaining in popularity outside of Canada. I wasn’t surprised to learn that upscale restaurants in New York and Maine have added a gourmet version of Poutine to their menus, since both states are popular with Quebecois and vice versa. But I was surprised to see places like Oregon, Los Angeles, San Francisco and Chicago on the list. And a little dismayed, since my dear friend Linda offered to feed me nothing but California cuisine when I visit her! I did have a good laugh, though, when I read the opening line of a New Yorker article, “As a punch line, poutine has a lot going for it.”

A Cheese By Any Other Name…

Is still a cheese, unless it’s called Bathtub Cheese, in which case it is Junior’s daily dose of Campylobacter bacterium! A child in Nevada fell ill after eating homemade cheese known as Bathtub Cheese.  The cheese was sold illegally door-to-door and is usually made in home bathtubs using unpasteurized milk. Ok, maybe it’s just me. Someone comes to your door. They want to sell you cheese made in their bathtub. How does this ever sound appetizing? But let’s say it does sound appetizing to you, you sick puppy, what on earth possesses you to feed it to your child?! It was made in somebody’s bathtub! Where they bathe. And make cheese. Possibly at the same time.

Yet Another Reason To Love Finland…

I know what you are all thinking. Another reason to love Finland? As if the fact that they are not Sweden wasn’t enough. Now you can thank Finland for helping us live to be 150 years old. Roughly. A new study from Finland suggests eating cheese boosts the immune system. Apparently, the probiotics that have rocked the yogourt world can be found in cheese and, when ingested regularly, can help to reduce deterioration of the immune system which occurs as you age. You can find a list of probiotic cheeses here. You can find my favourite Finn here. If you do visit her, tell her I sent you. She’ll give you the really good cookies.

I Hate To Say I Told You So…

In my last cheese news, I reported on the forecasted price hikes of cheese in the UK and said it was only a matter of time before it happened here. Well, I’m sorry to say, I was right. Block cheese prices were up last week on the Chicago Mercantile Exchange, a whopping 3 cents more per pound than the previous week. I may need to sell off a kid.

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  • I am seriously dying to try Poutine! But I would NEVER be brave enough to try Bathtub Cheese!

  • Kids for cheese… sounds reasonable. So cheese helps you to live longer… unless you pig out on it and get fat. Then you die early.

    It's a conundrum.

  • 00dozo

    At least the picture of the Poutine in the Globe article didn't look like yours! But the meat chunks kinda reminded me of dog food.

  • Darling Nicky, the Cali Cuisine I will feed you includes truffled goat cheese, truffled brie, and Monterey Jack. We can also find some wonderful tangy cheddars, but we will not do any kind of cheese that sounds like “poo leeen”. Excuse me! In SF? I need to do something about this pronto! I'm calling Wolfgang when I get off the computer. And Michael Stars too. Kulettos's as well. They had better not be serving that poo cheese.

    I've had bathtub gin, but never bathtub cheese. I doubt I ever will. With the gin, it's fine, that high alcohol content kills any bacteria anyway. With cheese? We just won't go there. Ever. And Ever is a mighty long time.

    And, yes, Nicky, I would brave to volcano to get your favorite crumbly if that's what is required. No need to hustle Olyn's younger brother.

  • Wolfgang has no idea what he's in for! You know, I was wondering what kind of drink to pair with bathtub cheese, and bathtub gin never occured to me! I kept thinking sparkling wine, 'cause what's a bath without the bubbles? Sweet thing, I would never ask you to brave a volcano for me – it would totally ruin your shoes!

  • That's exactly what I thought! They can stick as much duck in it as they want, it's still fries and gravy and cheese. And disgusting.

  • I'm nothing if not reasonable! A cheese conundrum….now my head hurts.

  • Sweetie, you are brave to want to try poutine and way too SMART to try bathtub cheese!

  • Totally forgot! Yeah, the shoes … Well, I will simply order it for you! Done deal!

  • Boy I am so happy I get to come here and read cheesy news, even if I only pick up a few crumbs. I never seem to find any holes in your coverage, no matter how aged the information might be. Ta dum……

  • Bathtub cheese sounds like some rural myth.

  • LOL! Every good reporter knows not to spread herself too thin or she'll get creamed by her diligent readers!

  • If only it was, Vange, if only it was…

  • Aww honey, there's nothing that makes me feel more at home than to come over here and see that you're flying the Finnish flag. It almost made it worth having to read about the bathtub cheese. Almost.

  • 🙂

  • Nicky, at the risk of being politically incorrect, I have an award for you on my site. If you choose to ignore it, it's fine, but I have also included Mike and the ever loveable and lusty Jepeto in the award too. After a post saying how a lot of folks hate awards, I have hesitated to pass these on, but sometimes you just have to say “What the heck!”

  • Okay I give up, how do you even pronounce “poutine”?

    Also? A person who is the kind of person who would buy door-to-door bathtub cheese is EASILY the same kind of person who would give it to their kid. Because once you've crossed a certain line, pretty much anything goes.

  • Poutine is pronounced “pooh-tsin”. And yes, it is as disgusting as it sounds.

    I guess I'm just amazed, because, even though I have a pretty adventurous palate, there are things I would try that I would never dream of feeding my kids – even the teens! Mind you, I'm not adventurous (or stupid) enough to try bathtub cheese!

  • Hon, I would never ignore an award, and certainly not one from you! After discovering that there are so many people who don't like them, we've also refrained from passing them along. At this point, we may be the last 2 blogs passing awards back and forth to each other! 🙂 Thank you for thinking of us, you know that means the world to us.

  • I did find it a little difficult to mention Finland and bathtub cheese in the same post, but a dedicated reporter has to report the news no matter what! I did console myself by positioning the Finnish item after the disgusting cheese, so the flag would be proudly displayed on our main page. If you click on the link to the list of good cheeses, you will see that there is no mention whatsoever of bathtub cheese. And there never will be!

    Oi maamme, Suomi, synnyinmaa…

  • My dear darling Nicky, I am so glad you and I both like getting awards. I think I was a little taken aback at how many people profess not to like them. But then, according to what I have read here, some people actually like that Poo cheese, so go figure! In any case, we will continue to pass awards back and forth and then just by that act alone, you, Mike, Jepeto and I will be the rulers of the lands, except Finland, which will always and forever be ruled by the Glorious Goddess herself, Ziva!

  • Just the phrase “bathtub cheese” makes me never want to eat it.

  • Couldn't agree with you more!

  • I thought bathtub cheese was that white stuff that gets stuck on the sides of the tub. Maybe that IS bathtub cheese. I'm sure my kids have eaten it at some point… now I'm getting it!

  • Maybe they start with the white goonk from the sides of the bathtub and add milk? I'm guessing they don't have to add any bacteria…


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