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Cheese In The News – Vol. 9

Cheese Gets Reconnected

On Sunday, I began experiencing some technical difficulties. My Internet connection kept getting dropped. I would barely have time to load a page and then bam! Gone. By Monday, frustration had quickly escalated to panic. By Tuesday, I was experiencing extreme withdrawal symptoms and contacted my Internet provider to send over a technician. He solved the problem in about 30 seconds by plugging the cable from my modem into the proper jack. See, my IP people are also the same people who provide my phone service. The jack has 2 holes, 1 for the phone, 1 for the modem. How it got switched from where it was to the other hole, where the phone cable would be if we had a phone in the basement, is a mystery because nobody touched it. Because nobody in my house ever touches anything they’re not supposed to touch. Mike did have to come by last night and reboot or reconfigure or re-something my router, but now, finally, I am back online and able to answer the 500 emails in my inbox, make an online payment for a ridiculous amount of money to my IP/phone provider for doing absolutely NOTHING, comment on other blogs, and bring you another informative edition of Cheese In The News. You’re welcome.

Roving Redhead Ranting Reporter…um…Reports

Correspondent Jen from Redhead Ranting saw this little item and thoughtfully sent it to us. It would seem that Wisconsin is truly the cheese capital of America. The state, well-known for it’s love of cheese, produced an astounding 2.65 billion pounds of cheese last year! Amazing. That’s almost as much cheese as Mike and I ate last year! Upon further research, though, I discovered that while Wisconsin does produce the most cheese, California completely kicks its ass in milk production. It would appear that happy cows really do come from California. I wonder if it’s the result of the “happy” grass that seems to grow so well out there?

Because You Shalt Not Worship A False Cheese

Chuck E. Cheese, the franchise of family entertainment restaurants that have absolutely nothing at all to do with cheese, saw a slight dip in earnings at the beginning of May. This appears to be the result of declining sales of junk food and sodas. The company plans on raising the price of a birthday party and reducing it’s discounts.  Can it be? Can we be witnessing the end of the UpChuck E. Cheese dynasty? Hopefully, their plan to counter the reduction in revenue will backfire and make the place less popular as it becomes too expensive for a cash-strapped society. I say hopefully, because from what I can see, regularly abandoned kids, burglaries, assaults and murders don’t seem to be a deterrent!

You Know It’s Only A Matter Of Time Before It Happens Here

Apparently cheese prices are getting ready to skyrocket across the pond. It’s estimated the cost of cheese in the UK will rise 10 percent over the next six months. Currently, the cost for 200g of Cheddar is about £1.90. Ouch! That’s like $10 US, and $50 CDN. Roughly.

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  • So, in essence, what you're saying is, you're not forking over the $100?

  • They're not challenged, they're just Canadian and way too polite to throw things and move the furniture!

  • You're in Canada? Where the hell is that?

    Gawd, I hope I remember that next time before I say something horribly ethnocentric.

  • Wait, you have Canadian aliens? Is that even legal?

  • mikewjattoomanymornings

    Look, what we have here is a failure to communicate. No, I'll be the first one to fork over the $100. Uhmm, let's see. Let me put this in language you'll understand:

    Cheese, fromage, cheesey cheesiest cheeses, if the cheese isn't cheesier than cheese and gets slipped a mickey or gets its ginches in a wad, eh? Cheese, you keener, is the cheese, which is why we'll need a double-double, or perhaps a cheesey two-four, if we've got enough loonies, and the cheese isn't a complete hoser. Chacheese now, or are you going to be a cheesey skookum and give my gonches a firm tug until I cough up the cheese?

  • Well, when you put it like that….

    I am not going anywhere near your gonches.

  • Canada is in Jen's backyard. And you can say whatever you like, we're Canadian. We will be horribly offended yet do nothing. 🙂

  • Pingback: We Work For Cheese » Blog Archive » Cheese In The News – Vol. 11()

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