Life

There Once Was A Man From…oh whatever

As I sit here on my terrace enjoying a perfect dusk with a cold beer, I find it hard to muster up the same frustration I felt during the working week and summarize the events that annoyed the crap out of me. In fact, it was a pretty good week even though my colleagues piss me off to no end (ok, it’s one guy). That’s why I’m going the easy route: the week in review, in poem format.  Besides, I’m heading out with a friend and don’t have time for a long post. So here you go:

5 days, 3 limericks, 2 haiku’s.

I have this new colleague to train
Who I think has a very small brain
But I’m still to be trainin’ him
It is vacant, his cranium
He is going to make me insane!

My boss does not have a clue!
Her voice sounds like a kazoo!
She axed my vacation!
She should be on probation!
And I’m still getting over the flu!

My clients are great!
But they are so demanding!
I do circus tricks!

We have procedures!
More than you can imagine!
Who came up with these?

My colleague smells worse than sasquatch
His shirt has this 3 day old blotch
He talks for attention
It should go without mention
That he needs a good punch in the crotch!

Phew! That was hard work (not). I’m going to have another beer.

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  • Enjoy a weekend of beer and poetry, oh and yes cheese. Happy Memorial day from NY

  • Dang Dude! Does Canada already have a First Poet Guy? I'm submitting your name if not. Have you ever heard of Augden Nash? He was a poet and I think he influenced me, and maybe even you. That poem is about the best thing I've read in a while. Sort of, know what I mean? Have a great long weekend if you get one in Canada and I hope that guy washes his shirt over the 3 days off.

  • Your limericks make me very sad. And I only like the third line of each haiku.

  • Sorry to hear about the colleague with the small brain. But hey, at least you can write poems about him, that should make it all better, right? No? Crap.

  • lol! Nice poem. Enjoy your beer and chill, I know the feeling.

  • mike

    Hahaaha…poetry always makes things better. That and long weekends 😉

  • mike

    Hahaaha…poetry always makes things better. That and long weekends 😉

  • mike

    Thanks Linda! We actually don’t get a long weekend, but I unofficially got one since I get monday off as a ‘thank you’ for being on call for most of the weekend.

    Yeah, unwashed colleagues are a little tough to deal with. Especially since we see them for almost 1/3 of the week!

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  • Thanks Linda! We actually don't get a long weekend, but I unofficially got one since I get monday off as a 'thank you' for being on call for most of the weekend.

    Yeah, unwashed colleagues are a little tough to deal with. Especially since we see them for almost 1/3 of the week!

  • Hahaaha…poetry always makes things better. That and long weekends 😉

  • Thanks Glenn!

  • This is an easy post? In poems? Cripes. I can't even write one in regular verse.

    Sorry about the smelly coworker. I used to have one of those. She smelled like dog. And then she'd run her heater under her desk, so then our office smelled like baked dog.

  • There is no way I could toss any of these out on a whim. You have talent, Mike.

  • Ewww! I can only imagine that's like having the car air on when my son is wearing sandals.

  • I have to give credit to beer
    But that also makes things quite unclear
    Still, thanks for the kudo
    It's like mental Judo
    You just need to rhyme with your ear

  • Thanks Kathy, I always found them to be fun exercises 😉

    Baked dog sounds awful. I guess you eventually get used to the smell. The other thing my colleague has going for him is his incessant yammering, which I do not get used to.

  • Really? I thought the rich center was the best part.

  • Too funny, my second to last post was all about Haiku – so of COURSE I loved yours!

  • Awesome. On my way to check it out!

  • MoreFunMom

    Love the poems but could do without the brainless and smelly. Here's hoping for a better week or more beer!

  • I couldn't come up with a Rhyme like that even if my life depended on it!

  • Great limericks. This is some funny stuff. 😀

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