He Enjoys Much Who Is Thankful For Little


Wild Turkey bourbon bottle

Our traditional Thanksgiving Day dinner

The title of this post is a quote by Thomas Secker, who I’m pretty sure was really, really drunk when he said it. In any case, you may not know this, but it’s Thanksgiving here in the Great White North.  We have ours earlier than our counterparts to the south, mainly because, by November, it’s too freakin’ cold to be thankful for anything other than Canadian Whiskey. I thought I’d take a moment to share a few things I’m thankful for.

I am thankful for Canadian Whiskey.

I am thankful I have 3 wonderful children, and not 4.

I am thankful none of those children have knocked anybody up.

I am thankful I am not knocked up.

I am thankful my youngest child is finally toilet trained and I can stop buying diapers. Well, for him anyway.

I am thankful I have I have a wonderful man who takes care of our family in so many ways, like carefully montitoring our finances and buying stuff like one-ply toilet paper on sale.

I am thankful antibacterial handsoap was also conveniently on sale.

I am thankful one-ply toilet paper is no longer on sale.

I am thankful for my wonderful parents who will still lend me money.

I am thankful for my father’s insistence that I cook the turkey instead of my mother.

I am thankful for elastic-waist pants.

I am thankful for cheese.

I am thankful I didn’t have to post bail for anyone this weekend, Mike.

I am thankful I have a job I don’t have to go to today.

I am thankful for hairdressers who understand vague hand gestures and adjectives like “longshort” and “fullbutnotpouffy” and don’t do this to my hair:

I am thankful I don’t have a hideous disfugrement. Anymore.

I am thankful there are no Chuck E. Cheese franchises in Canada.

I am thankful Donny Osmond stopped recording albums years ago.

And finally, dear readers, I am thankful you take the time to read our blog and comment and tell all your friends about us and like us on Facebook and Tweet us and Stumble us and Digg us and add us to your blogrolls and aid us with our plans for world domination. Did I mention I’m thankful for Canadian Whiskey?

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