Food

At The Grocery Store

Ya ever walk around the grocery aisles and see products that just make you say, “huh”? Of course you do.

My last trip to the grocery store revealed some “interesting” product names, so I thought I’d share.

I don’t know about you, but grocery shopping often inspires me to cook awesome meals. When I look at all the multitudes of delicious food, I start thinking of ways that I can combine them. However, my last trip to the grocery store revealed some very uninspiring product names, so I thought I’d share.

I’m usually on the hunt for cheese, so imagine my confusion when I found this:
mozzasnack snacking cheese

Why is it called “Snacking Cheese”??? Isn’t ALL cheese inherently “snacking cheese”? Before now, I never thought of snacking on cheese before. What a great idea! Idiots.

Then I was in the cracker section:
roundy crackers

I totally dig the flavour, but the name? Could it be less inspired? How long did the marketing team bang their heads on the boardroom table until they came up with “Roundy”?

“What should we call them?”
“I don’t know!”
“I can’t think of anything either!”
“Quick! We have a deadline!”
“Ok ok! Roundy!”
“Perfect!”

Idiots.

Finally, I found the holy grail of worst names for a product ever:
beaver tuna

Yep. Beaver Tuna.

Your eyes do not device you: BEAVER TUNA

Sorry for the poor quality but I was convulsing while trying to focus. Really. I would buy Aardvark Tuna 100 times faster than Beaver Tuna. Beaver Tuna has to be THE least appealing name ever.

It’s on special though, so it might be a good time to stock up.

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  • I would SO buy Beaver Tuna. Bad name but great for so many jokes. Pick up a case for me. 

  • I do this all the time: seeing things at the store that crack me up…I just keep forgetting to get the (blurry) photos on my camera phone too. Thanks for reminding me…now next time I’m at the store I’ll have to do the same thing. Don’t worry I’ll give you credit. I’m all about the credit. 🙂

  • Mikewj

    I’m starving. I’d like some beaver on a roundy, please.

  • No you wouldn’t.

  • Yep. With Beaver Tuna, the jokes write themselves.

  • I usually forget too. My old phone had a terrible camera, so with the new one I often forget that I have a decent camera with me at all times.

  • Do you think the beaver tuna smells like fish? Bad, I know but I had to get it out…

  • Isn’t there a law or something that forbids the making of tuna out of our national symbol? So many beavers, so little time.

  • Jepeto

    Kinda the female version of smegma cheese. Cool!

  • I agree, it had to be said.

  • But cheap! 1.19 a can!

  • Oh snap!! BEAVER TUNA is KILLING me!! ahahahaha

  • Marketing department wall of shame!  Who let theses things make it to production?  Do you suppose they laid off the very people they need to attract customers.  Who asks, ‘Want a beaver sandwich’?  or ‘Snack cheese on a roundy or a squarey?’  Geez!

  • I wonder what Jessica Simpson would do with that title. “Is it really Beaver?” Hey Nicky, I wanted to tell you that I gave you a few awards today. Hope that’s okay. You can find them on my blog http://annieboreson.blogspot.com. Enjoy.

  • Definitely a third rate marketing team!

  • Thanks, Annie!

  • It’s the worst name ever!

  • Sofa king funny!

  • Beaver Tuna? Are you kidding me? That is the epitome of crappy marketing. They certainly weren’t thinking of their target audience. 

  • Exactly. The rule should be: never ever name a meat/fish product after an animal. Especially if that animal is a rodent. And especially if that rodent is a beaver.

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