This Just In: Overeating Fatty Over-Processed Foods With Little-To-No Nutritional Value Makes You Fat

Really? Are they really going to make me state the obvious? It seems they are.

I just read this article in Forbes about how the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine (PCRM) has decided to raise public awareness regarding cheese and how it turns you into this:

billboards, fat people

Yes, I am certain *this* is the result of eating too much *cheese*

The ads went up in Albany, New York, where they claim nearly 63% of Albany’s adults are overweight or obese. The PCRM goes on to state: “One in four New Yorkers under the age of 18 is obese and the obesity rate for children between 6 and 11 years of age has quadrupled over 30 years.”

They also note that Albany school lunches are abundant in cheesy foods, like pizzas and triple-cheese lasagnas, and that cheese is the number-one source of saturated fat in the American diet.

So, it’s all cheese’s fault. The cheese makes us not understand that triple-cheese lasagna does not mean to add three times the cheese instead of using three types of cheese while NOT increasing the final quantity.

And I’m sure the pizza’s 3-inch thick crust, made with processed white flour and lard, has nothing to do with increasing waistlines. Or the greasy pepperoni, cut 1/4- inch thick. Not to mention the gallon of soda served alongside.

pepperoni, pizza, cheese

This looks so healthy, I mistook it for a vegetable.

No, it’s definitely the cheese.

Now, I realize I could easily be accused of bias. I love cheese. Somewhat unnaturally, I might add. But I ask you to consider the fact that the French eat cheese 3 times per day. Everyday. And yet, they are not facing an obesity crisis. Not even close.

Actually, the closest thing they’ve got to a crisis is determining just how high up their noses should be while ignoring tourists asking for directions.

victorian era, nobles

See the guy in the back? In the red shirt? Obviously a tourist. Mock him at will.

What really killed me about this article was a quote by Marion Nestle, a Paulette Goddard Professor in the Department of Nutrition, Food Studies and Public Health at New York University.

She disagrees with the ads but includes this brilliant analysis of the campaign: “… they focus on personal responsibility without saying anything about the food marketing environment that makes it so difficult for so many people to eat healthfully.”

Really? They focus on personal responsibility? I thought they focused on cheese being the root of all fatty evil. And I’m sorry, but the food marketing environment makes it difficult for people to eat healthy? Seriously?

Seems the PCRM isn’t alone in blaming others.

hamburger, onions, onion rings, buns

Marketing made me eat this instead of a salad. Marketing also made me buy a John Deere tractor on sale. Nobody can control themselves in the face of marketing. Nobody.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to ask my doctor about Cialis.

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  • Where kids are concerned I believe it is the food marketing at fault.  Not all parents have the will, or desire, to stop their kids eating rubbish every day.  They’re even dishing it up at schools now!

    If you want to lay blame anywhere, I say blame the manufacturers that fill our foods with such rubbish.  I am shocked at how many young mothers in the UK don’t ever cook. They don’t even know HOW to cook! They, and their kids, live on TV dinners and take-away.

    It’s not cheese. It’s instant foods and lack of exercise – simple!

  • It is not cheese.  It is not wine. It is not cigarettes.  Look at the people in Paris.  They walk for miles just to get from point A to point B in the metro.  They eat bread and cheese every day.  They drink wine every day.  They are not fat.  They don’t really eat “processed” foods.  They don’t eat layers and layers of meat.  They have one slice of ham on a ham sandwich.  And it’s a skinny slice of ham.  It is served on a fresh baguette with a little butter and a slice of tomato.  It’s delish!  They don’t put gobs and gobs of anything on their food.  It’s not that complicated.  Just don’t be a piggy and you’ll be fine.

  • Also, move to Paris.

  • Dude, it’s NOT the cheese.



  • AMEN, Linda!

  • I totally agree.  Victimhood is rampant these days.  No one wants to take personal responsibility and then they wonder why their lives suck.  A life without Cotswold cheese is not a life worth living, but I don’t eat a fucking pound of it at a time.

  • I do agree with you that food marketing is a strong influence on children. BUT! It’s our job as parents and adults to teach them self-control. Honestly, if we don’t have the will or desire to do that, then we should make the decision not to have kids. Lord knows, I know it’s not easy and there have been times when I’ve caved in but my kids also know the difference between good food and junk food!  And they like good food too.

  • You nailed it!! It really isn’t complicated, but most people refuse to see that because life is even easier when they blame someone or something other than themselves!

  • Exactly! It’s easy to blame others but the truth is nobody else is shoving the food down our collective throats.

  • And can you give me Hallelujah?! 🙂

  • I’d love to, but I’m not sure I can get my nose up that high. 🙂

  • And don’t forget the gallon of soda! And the greasy, fatty meat. And the packaged, processed “snack” cakes for dessert. And the…

    Well, I think you understand. 🙂

  • There are lots of people who should never be parents. They have no self control, let alone the ability to control and teach their children!

  • Indeed!

  • Yep!

  • Oh goody, finally someone other than me realizes cheese is the root of all evil in the world!

    Seriously, though, some people should just try drinking water instead of soda and having an apple instead of cake, it would do wonders.

  • I posted comments here the other day and now they are gone.
    I don’t remember what I wrote but it was funny, witty, and life changing. 

  • Mikewj

    You’re awfully defensive of cheese. Is there something we ought to know about you and cheese?

  • Mikewj

    You mean it’s my fault I’m, uhm, a little portly? Well, fuck.

  • Mikewj

    Still waiting, Meleah.

  • Mikewj

    OMFG, I’m so hungry now.

  • Mikewj

    I doubt it, Shawn.

  • Mikewj

    Shut up and leave me alone. I hate you.  

  • Mikewj

    You could if you’d stop staring at your shoes.

  • Mikewj

    That’s EXACTLY what I told my mom and dad, but would they listen? No! I hate them.

  • You did read the part where I wrote: “I love cheese. Somewhat unnaturally, I might add.”, didn’t you?

  • I doubt it Shawn.

  • Shut up and leave Mike alone. I love you.

  • You’re always hungry!

  • No. Never. You can’t make me.

  • No, of course not. I’m going to blame your kids. They drove you to eat.

  • You might want to pull up a chair.

  • It wasn’t your parents, you know. It was their kids.

  • Mikewj

    It’s true! They did. I gained 10-15 pounds with each one (I used to be super-skinny).

  • Mikewj

    A La-Z-Boy.

  • Mikewj

    Yeah, and it was sooooo hawt! Nothing gets me going like a woman and her Gouda.

  • Waiting for what?

  • 🙂

  • 😉

  • Funny, I didn’t gain an ounce when you had your kids.

  • We can’t blame our increasing waistlines on cheese or any one food, any one group or event.  We are responsible for our own circumstances.  I agree there is a lot of outside influence, busy lives, which equals quick fix meals or junk food.  We have to reprogram ourselves to eat healthier and exercise more.

  • Exactly! While I understand that there are genetic and other factors like illness, or certain medications, that can make it extremely difficult for some people to maintain a healthy weight, I think the major issue causing this “obesity crisis” is simply a lack of discipline.

  • Oh please.  CHEESE is doing this??!  What about video games, TV, SODA (I think soda and fast food are IT)…. look at the Greeks… they live to be a million years old and they LOVE cheese!  It is all how you do it…. cheese is GOOD!  Actually, I eat a bit of cheese sometimes just before a workout for protein.  So PFFTT on those people who think cheese is bad!


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